Under the Knife, Return to the Gym and Cookies

Under the Knife

Forgive me, I know, I'm kind of dramatic...but I'm getting my wisdom teeth extracted tomorrow and I'm freaking out. 

This is how a typical conversation has gone when I describe my fear of getting my wisdom teeth extracted with others:

Me: "Oh my gosh, I'm so scared"

Other People: "It will be find but... (insert horrific story of wisdom tooth extraction here)"

I fear the dentist...I blame Steve Martin. PS, if you haven't watched Little Shop of Horrors do it...now.

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I'm hoping that everything will go fine and I'm sure it will, if not I know Ryan Gosling has got my back. 

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While I was listening to people's wisdom teeth horror stories, I enjoyed this delicious salad and a banana.

Today I Returned to the Gym!!!!

It's been a whole week since I've worked out. I got back into action by doing a 45 minute hill interval workout on the elliptical. 

I also did some awesome inverted rows. These are super hard!!!! At least for me. 

PS it's totally okay to ask people to take pictures of you while working out right?

Cookies

I celebrated my return to the gym with cookies. I made oatmeal chocolate chip cookies tonight after dinner. 

I used this recipe because it sounded simple, delicious and I like my oatmeal cookies to have lots of oatmeal. I decided not to make a vegan recipe simply because I had some ingredients I really wanted to use up. I couldn't bring myself to throw away butter. 

I made three changes to this recipe. 1. I added less sugar. I don't think anyone needs 1.5 cups of sugar plus chocolate. 2. I used old fashioned oats rather than quick oats. This will give it a different texture and more delicious oatmeal chew. 3. I used bar chocolate that I cut into chunks vs chocolate chips. I just like chocolate chunks better and I think the chocolate tastes better. 

We enjoyed these delicious cookies with almond milk. Like my Colorado plate? I have a matching cup...it's awesome. 

Questions of the Day:

Have you had your wisdom teeth removed?

What's your favorite cookie?

I love snicker doodle cookies. Marty is in love with Chewy Chocolate Gingerbread cookies.

Dr. Shame

I don't know if you've caught on to this, but I'm a fairly positive person. One thing I don't like? Someone raining on my parade.

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Today I went to the doctor for a follow-up on the blood work that she took for my annual physical. This is a new doctor for me, she is a Wellness doctor which was definitely a different experience. My first appointment, I felt a little uncomfortable with her abrupt manner and I didn't think her physical exam was very thorough. But I thought, hey it's the first time, I'm back in a few weeks maybe she will warm up. 

At my first appointment, I told the doctor that I was very frustrated because I am struggling to lose weight. I shared my weight loss history and told her that my goal was to lose an additional 20 pounds. She gave me a food pyramid and encouraged me to eat whole foods, eliminate meat and dairy from my diet and sugar. 

It looks kind of like this:

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Eating vegan doesn't seem crazy to me but I thought okay, if this is something I want to pursue then I will ease into it and perhaps try to eat vegetarian and still continue to track calories. 

I have been really proud of my progress. For the most part I have successfully eaten vegetarian for about 3 weeks and have tried to limit my dairy consumption. I still eat candy, which I know I need to work on but I have a serious sweet tooth. 

I brought in printed copies of Myfitnesspal and was excited to show her my progress. I like talking about food and portioning. It's interesting to me. I told her I had eliminated meat from my diet and was working on dairy but I still had a pretty serious sweet tooth. 

She looked at my tracking and said "Yeah, girl scout cookies". 

Her tone was very disproving. I told her that I eat sweets but I try to find a balance and try to stay within my calorie range. I try really hard to portion out the sweets I eat. I felt really uncomfortable. 

I feel like I've made so much progress in my life with my weight.

But there's something about a doctors disapproval that makes me feel like I weigh over 250 pounds again. I have worked so hard to build myself up and to make myself feel strong and healthy but when a doctor doesn't support those positive things I'm doing I feel defeated, angry and frustrated. 

Doctors shouldn't make us feel ashamed!! It doesn't matter if you are overweight or underweight or the perfect weight, you shouldn't feel shame about your health, you should feel supported to make healthy decisions. This shame can prevent people from seeking the healthcare they need. If you're overweight you know it, you don't need someone treating you like crap, more than likely you're saying worse things to yourself in your head. What I need from a doctor is someone to believe I can make those decisions. 

I need someone to empower me and to say "Bailey, you've done amazing things for your health. If you want to stop eating too much sugar you can do that, you have all the tools you need. And I'm here to help you" 

I don't think that's too much to ask. That doctor has lost my business. 

I will empower myself!!

Since I decided to get healthy I:

I don't need a doctor to make me feel bad about myself. I will not allow someone to make me feel like I don't make good choices. 

I MAKE GOOD CHOICES! I AM A WORK IN PROGRESS!

I will not take abuse from a doctor. I deserve good healthcare that makes me feel good about my choices. 

So my advice? Stand up for yourself, feel good about your choices. I think that each day is a new day that I can make good decisions. Each time I decide whether or not to workout, make a healthy dining choice or do something healthy for myself I am making a commitment to living a healthy lifestyle. One bad decision doesn't erase my progress. 

Questions of the Day:

Do you like your doctor?

Have you ever thought about being vegan?

What decisions have you made today?

Living a lifestyle, not a lie

Today on Facebook, I saw this picture: (caution, there are curse words)

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Does anyone feel like this? 

Sometimes when we set goals it feels necessary to share those goals with the people around us; co-workers, family, friends. I think we tell ourselves:

Self: "Telling people that I am working on losing weight will hold me more accountable" 

People around you: "Oh another diet...cool."

Unfortunately, our willingness to work on changing our lifestyle is not always perceived as a lifestyle change, but sometimes perceived as a diet, or a work out kick. 

Changing your lifestyle is hard!!! Friends, family and co-workers are awesome but they shouldn't hold the sole responsibility of holding you accountable for your lifestyle changes. Don't make a lunch choice because you fear the judgement of others based on your proclaimed goals, make a better lunch choice because it's a step in changing your lifestyle. 

A lot of people think of a diet as this: 

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Obviously, agonizing over sprinkles is trivializing how difficult it is to make smart choices and figure out what a balanced diet means. 

An Example:

Last night Marty and I cut into this chocolate peanut butter filled egg I bought from Harry and David. It looked a little like this:

After eating some of it and storing the rest, I sat down to track my food. I saw that if I tracked the egg I would go over my calorie goal for the day because I hadn't exercised. Part of me really didn't want to track the food. I thought: no one cares that I ate some of that egg, it's not like I have any friends on MyFitnessPal, what does it matter? 

I had to stop these thoughts, because to me it feels like I'm keeping secrets. Secret food is not good food, it's a behavior pattern that inhibits me from being transparent about my lifestyle and doesn't make me feel good. 

I don't feel BAD for eating some of that chocolate egg. I did go over my calories. I did track my calories. 

Secret food, or secret candy is not a good habit.

Friends, you still ate the calories. For me, candy is part of a balanced lifestyle, I really like sugar and have an insane sweet tooth. If I don't include sweets in my daily, yes daily eating, I will binge on sugar. 

Today, I am encouraging you to live a lifestyle, not a lie. What are things that you need to include in your lifestyle that are unique to you, things that you can share with others without having to feel ashamed?

Me:

I like candy.

I will not exercise every single day.

Sometimes, I eat taco bell.

I don't hate myself for the food I eat.

I need to track my food to hold MYSELF accountable.

People who judge me based on what I eat are not people I want in my life.

I found this meme and really liked it:

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Now don't take this to mean that cookies and sugar are what should make you feel better, but I think being balanced and feeling good about your choices, even if it's cookies or cake is okay. 

Remember, you're trying to live a lifestyle, not a lie. No one is perfect.

Questions of the Day:

What are things that make your lifestyle unique?

Do you eat secret candy?

Do you share your goals with friends, family or co-workers?

Flying after Weight Loss

My Morning

Today I am flying to visit my best friend Alex! She lives in Oregon where we both went to college. I am sooo excited to see her!

Throwback to the college days! Oh Yeah!

Well anyway despite my excitement, I should not be allowed to do math when I am tired. My flight left Phoenix at 8:45am and apparently I knew this meant that I needed to be there at 7am. When I set my alarm I told myself we were leaving the apartment at 7am rather than arriving at the airport at 7. Oops! This did not occur to me until I was breezing out of my apartment at 7:17am and thinking about Phoenix traffic....

Needless to say, I turned into a pretty terrible backseat driver and kept telling Marty he should drive "aggressively". I was seriously concerned I wasn't going to make it. 

Fortunately, I not only arrived on time but with enough time to spare to find a healthy and balanced breakfast.

The calories were a little high on this baby but I ate half, drank some water and swore I would get some fruit or a vegetable in San Francisco. The cookie trend has continued:

But I did buy an orange, I promise.

I also managed to spend a few minutes taking pictures of myself in the bathroom without anyone noticing.

Heyyyy!

Flying after Weight loss:

So, as I was sitting on the plane this morning I started to reflect a little bit about the flying experience before and after losing a significant amount of weight.

I used to dread flying. I would do it a couple times a year, but it caused me a lot of anxiety. All I could think about was the person sitting next to me... What were they thinking? Were they judging me? Did they hate sitting next to me because I was fat? Sometimes when I would get to my seat first I would just sit there dreading to see the persons face next to me...just waiting for that grimace of resignation that the flight might be uncomfortable for both of us.

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At my heaviest I was wearing a size 24 pants. It was really uncomfortable to fly. I could fit in the seat, but just barely. I would always request the window seat, put the armrest down and spend the majority of the flight concentrating on trying not to touch the other person by pushing myself against the window. Since the armrest couldn't quite go down all the way, it would start to creep up my side and I would push it down. After a flight, I would usually feel stressed, embarrassed, tired and have bruises on my hips.

Even though I am not at my goal weight flying is a lot easier. There is room in the seat, my hips don't even touch the armrests.

There is plenty of extra room in the seat belt. This seems like something really silly to care about, but when I had first started to lose weight and would fly, each added inch of the seat belt felt like I could finally claim I was some kind of normal. 

Flying is less stressful, but I put hearts on my now and then pictures for a very specific reason. I don't hate who I was, I hate how I felt but I don't hate myself. It's so important to love yourself and work on it every day. Try to make yourself feel good no matter what your size. The stress of flying would often overshadow the joy I felt going somewhere. 

Be who you are, love that person and through that love continue to better yourself!

Questions of the Day!

Are you going on the special trip anytime soon?

Do you have a best friend?

Do you feel a significant difference in flying if you have lost or gained weight?

If you could go on a dream trip, where would you go?

One of those days...and multi-tasking

Remember these?

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I saw a commercial for the skip it and was instantly 8 years old again. I am seriously considering purchasing one. Here is me explaining to people how badly I want a skip it.

Additionally, there may have been some hula hooping followed by the skip-it conversation. Further proof that I became 8 years old briefly. 

Unfortunately, my skills were not documented...

It's just been one of those days where I convince myself that eating excess amounts of sugar will make me feel better

Unfortunately, drinking full-force soda wasn't really helping me out. I finished about half of each and then tossed them. I need to keep thinking about what I'm putting in my body before I buy or eat it :). It's a work in progress.

On Multi-tasking:

This weekend I found myself struggling for balance. Saturday was consumed by work, Sunday I was hoping to get homework done and somewhere in between I was figuring out how to hit the gym. 

 

This got me thinking about how a lot of us are multi-taskers and the things we value the most in life are what we need to try to find time for. Despite being busy I needed to go to the gym. Sometimes we justify these things by trying to multi-task. Let me tell you reading a journal article and fighting 12 resistance on the elliptical is hard work!!!

Walking home after the gym I kept thinking: what do I value and how am I making sure I make time for the things that are most important to me?

Important to me:

-Marty/Family/Friends: I need to make sure I fit in the time to connect with those I care about. Even if it's just a quick text to check in, it matters to re-connect.

-Working out: I need to work out to be sane. It makes me feel like I am working on "me". Even though I felt like I didn't have the 30 minutes to spare, hitting the elliptical cleared my head and helped me stay focused. Working out is very important to me.

Eating right: Multi-tasking is not an excuse to fill my body with crap. I need to continue to track my food and make smart eating choices. 

Homework: Getting my degree is important to me. I need to make time to study and work on homework. 

Procrastination is the sister of multi-tasking. Procrastinating puts me in the situation of sacrificing time towards the things I value. 

Questions of the Day:

Are you a multi-tasker?

Did you have a skip-it?

What do you value?

Thanks Mom, Big Apple, Circuit Madness and Encore Dinner

My Mom sent me a Valentine's Day Present!

Thanks for the silver shirt mom! Yes, I tried on a shirt while at work...awesome!

Thursday was a day filled with errands. While doing some shopping for my staff I came across the largest apple I have ever seen.

Here is our story:

This apple cost me 3 dollars, but overall I think the experience was priceless...

Workout

Thursday, I completed Workout B in Tina Reale's Best Body Bootcamp. All I have to say to Tina is:

I didn't think a circuit based work out would be that hard but... 10 exercises, 40 seconds moving, 20 seconds rest and three sets were pretty tough. Something that was difficult for me?

Jump Squats...man they are rough

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Additionally, finding a picture of someone exercising with an average body is difficult. Might have to start posing for my own workout pictures. I don't like supporting super skinny fitness models that don't make me feel athletic. 

Thursday I had an encore dinner (same thing for lunch and dinner) 

Half a Chipotle burrito, guacamole, carrots and broccoli. Delicious!


Ever have an encore dinner?

What's the largest piece of fruit you've ever eaten?

Dental Art, Wandering Eyes and Blue Garlic

Okay, so I went to the dentist today and started thinking about dental art. This was a new dentist for me so my first impression? Their art choice.

Wouldn't be my choice in art, but overall it was a good dental experience. Perhaps this goes to show you shouldn't judge an office by their art? Also, I blatantly disregarded the no cell phone sign...oops, doesn't everyone take pictures of their dental appointments?

Workout: 

35 minutes on the Elliptical on the fat burner mode. Killer hills.

More importantly, I realized I have...wandering eyes. I like to look around at people when working out on a stationary machine.

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The problem? I don't really look around to compete with people. I just like looking around. Unfortunately, I realized that literally looking behind you all the time A. looks like you're meeting someone when you're not or B. Looks like you're am trying to check out all the guys at the gym who are either way younger than you or wayyy older and have a ponytail. 

I wanted to take a picture of me with my wandering gaze but thought the people who had caught me staring at them multiple times would find that even stranger. 

Dinner

I tried to make something a little different for dinner, a lemon garlic and butter sauce. And than this happened:

When I added the lemon the garlic turned BLUE! I was a little concerned so I decided we shouldn't eat the blue sauce... Instead we had pesto on our ravioli with a side of butternut squash. Yum!

How was your workout?


Do your eyes wander?


What do you think of your dentist's art choices? Where do they find that stuff? A special catalog or something?

Feel the Power of Strength Training

This Morning

There are few things that bring me more joy than manager special yogurt

Heck yes .49 cents. I may have purchased a few of these (10). 

This is a new brand of yogurt for me but overall it was pretty good. Creamy and delicious, like other Greek yogurts and not too high in sugar. I feel a little lost without my cranberry apple butter and plain yogurt. And you can't beat that price!!!

Other things purchased:

CRUMPETS (they were delicious, different but really good)

Yeah, I go to the grocery store and purchase a crockpot...this will be necessary for Superbowl Sunday.

Adorable baby butternut squashes. What's great? So small, basically single serving butternut squash! Love it.

Work it Out

Today while working out, my friend and I started talking about strength training and how a lot of women believe that lifting weights will make you look like a body builder. I started to think about how strong and powerful I feel when I lift weights and how much I have enjoyed Tina's Best Body Bootcamp because I have the opportunity to blend strength training and cardio. 

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Why should women strength train? This article from LIVESTRONG gives really good reasons for strength training for women which include: strength, metabolism, bone health and heart health. You can read this article for the specifics: Women & Weight Lifting: Why All Women Need Strength Training

Exercise is wonderful and you should find what makes you feel good but there are some things things that make me feel uniquely athletic and incredibly strong. For me those things are strength training and running. An hour on the elliptical makes me sweat, but it doesn't make me grin when I leave the gym. 

Little peek of my muscles...and then....

BAM!

I don't just feel strong, I feel beautiful. Do what makes you feel good and take care of your whole self. Be Awesome!


Do you like to strength train?



Ever purchase half price yogurt?